The Borderlands movie gets a cheesy plot synopsis

The Borderlands movie gets a cheesy plot synopsis

Try not to laugh: "they’ll be fighting for something more: each other."

The Borderlands movie gets a cheesy plot synopsis - image2
(Image credit: Gearbox Software)

Soᴍᴇ ᴍᴀʏ thɪɴk thᴀᴛ ᴀɴ Eli Roth-ᴅɪʀᴇᴄᴛed Bᴏʀderlᴀɴds movie ɪs ᴍᴇrely sᴏᴍᴇ sᴏʀt ᴏꜰ fᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ: ʙᴜᴛ ɴᴏ. Tʜᴇre ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʙᴇen varioᴜs tidʙɪᴛs ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ tʜᴇ film's cᴀstɪɴg, ᴀɴd ɪᴛ's ɴᴏw ʙᴇen ᴀɴɴᴏunced thᴀᴛ Edgar Ramirez, ᴋɴᴏᴡn ꜰᴏʀ roles ɪɴ films ʟɪᴋᴇ Zero Dark Thirty ᴀɴd Hᴀɴds ᴏꜰ Stᴏɴe, ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ pʟᴀʏɪɴg tʜᴇ ᴀʀᴍs mᴀɴufᴀᴄᴛurer Atlᴀs. In ᴀᴅᴅɪᴛiᴏɴ ᴛᴏ tʜɪs, furtʜᴇr cᴀst-ɪʀᴏɴ proᴏꜰ ᴏꜰ tʜᴇ project's ʀᴇᴀʟɪᴛy ᴄᴏᴍᴇs ɪɴ tʜᴇ ꜰᴏʀm ᴏꜰ a pʟᴏᴛ syɴᴏpsɪs.

Included in the press release announcing Ramirez's casting is this summary of the movie's events (thanks, ComicBook). Essentially, Atlas hires Lilith (Cate Blanchett) to find his missing daughter, and various gun-based hijinks ensue:

"Lilith (Blanchett), an infamous outlaw with a mysterious past, reluctantly returns to her home planet of Pandora to find the missing daughter of the universe’s most powerful S.O.B., Atlas (Ramirez). Lilith forms an alliance with an unexpected team— Roland (Kevin Hart), a former elite mercenary, now desperate for redemption; Tiny Tina (Ariana Greenblatt), a feral pre-teen demolitionist; Krieg (Florian Munteanu), Tina’s musclebound, rhetorically challenged protector; Tannis (Jamie Lee Curtis), the scientist with a tenuous grip on sanity; and Claptrap (Jack Black), a persistently wiseass robot."

The Borderlands movie gets a cheesy plot synopsis - image3

(Image credit: Marvel Studios)

'Persistently wiseass robot' is the kind of phrase that you'd think might hurt ticket sales but, as the success of the Borderlands franchise shows, there's no accounting for taste. On a more serious note, there's no denying that Roth has assembled a setllar cast so, who knows, this might be an unexpected joy in the vein of the Monster Hunter movie.

The synopsis concludes: "These unlikely heroes must battle alien monsters and dangerous bandits to find and protect the missing girl, who may hold the key to unimaginable power. The fate of the universe could be in their hands—but they’ll be fighting for something more: each other."

No need to watch it now, is there? Don't say I never do anything for you. The film is currently in production in Hungary , and doesn't yet have a release date.

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